I want to start from the beginning.  So you can understand why I did what I did. For whoever reads this.  I met him at the park.  I was in a weird stage of my life at the time.  I had been struggling with a long stretch of loneliness before I met him.  I wasn't close with my family and didn't really have any friends.  Visitations to my parents house weren't the best either.  It usually consisted of hello when they opened the door and barely even cared I was there.  I went mostly because if I didn't, then I would have almost no interactions with any people.  They were at least polite in a passive kind of way.  I moved out at eighteen and it wasn't on the greatest terms.  They basically told me that I had to start my own life and leave, without so much a plan on how to do so or any money to get started. So that probably had something to do with how cold our relationship is with each other. It felt like abandonment even though they weren't far away. They just didn't feel like people I could turn to if I needed help.  And after a while, I felt like it was the right choice for me to stay away but it did affect me in how I feel around people.

     When I met him, it was a sunny day, I remember because he mentioned it. I was sitting on a park bench reading a book about doomed teenage love. I liked reading outside because it was the only time I could be around people without actually having to interact with any of them.  I could watch a couple throw a frisbee for their dog who would run with maximum effort to catch it before it could hit the ground.  I watched ladies walking together as both of them pushed strollers and gossiped about something I knew nothing about.  There were usually ducks gliding around the small pond next to some large trees.  There was a social life here that I liked to be near to but also stay at a distance.  

     He came up to me like we had known each other for years.  "Nice day out huh?" he said as I looked up from my book, glancing around to make sure he was talking to me.  No one ever talked to me.  I replied in a shy whisper, "oh, uh...yes, really nice," and then quickly went back to looking at my book.

"Not too many clouds.  Looks perfect and the temperature is just right," he said in a cheerful tone. It was a perfect day, I thought.

"Yeah," I replied trying to return to my book.  He then sat down next to me.

"What are you reading?" he asked glancing over at my book.  
"Oh," I said closing it quickly and turning the cover over to hide the title.  "Uh, just some dumb book," I replied trying to hide my embarrassment of reading a romance novel about doomed teenage love.  

"Dumb?" he replied, "must not be that dumb if you're reading it," he said flirtatiously smiling.

"I guess," I said wondering why he was talking to me at all.

"I like to read too but I barely get the motivation anymore, know what I mean? I get sleepy.  Maybe I should read outside like you, when it looks like this," he said looking up to the sky. "Anyway, I saw you from over there and was wondering...umm...that maybe....so, there's a coffee shop not too far from here.  Maybe I can get you a coffee or a tea and we can chit chat?  Maybe share some book recommendations."

I liked that he got nervous to ask me.  I usually felt vulnerable when people tried to talk to me but something about how he got nervous really opened me up to the idea of having a coffee with him.

"Aren't we already chit chatting?" I replied in a playful manner. It was obvious he was interested in me.  I may have been a lonely girl but not an idiot.  But my question was why? Why me?  I wasn't doing anything but reading a dumb book.  I was just some lonely girl.  Or maybe, That Was the reason why.

"I guess we are. What's your name by the way?"

"I'm Lily."

"James."

****

     We grew close over the next few months and started a relationship.  He became my whole world.  There were parts of my personality that felt asleep before him.  Parts that felt were awakened by our connection.  I felt like a different woman.  I had felt unworthy of love or even attention or just self respect and he made all those feelings feel like distant memories.  I knew it could just be part of the honeymoon phase of a relationship but for me, it felt different and I didn't care if it was just a phase.  It was everything to me.  Of course, I knew that is what every girl says as well. I have read many romance novels after all.  But I loved him more than my words can explain here.  I didn't want to lose what I had with him.  I would never abandon him the way everyone else in my life had done to me.  I was going to change that part of my life.  Break the cycle that had me trapped inside a lonely girl.  Maybe that was the reason I did what I did.

****

     We moved in together after about a year.  We found a small apartment at the edge of the city.  It wasn't nice but it was our first place together.  I cherished it and everything we had within it.  Every small trinket and piece of furniture we bought together.  I loved every last thing inside that apartment because we had built the space together.  But even though we were happy, we were also broke.  He had a high school diploma and I had only just gotten my GED.  Job options weren't robust.  Life wasn't the easiest and there were plenty of nights where we were eating leftovers that probably should have been thrown out.  Bread with mold we just tore off.  Or ate nothing at all.  It wasn't the easiest of times but we made it work.  Being with him made all those hardships feel like nothing.  It usually only got rough in the winter time.  I would work two jobs but one was seasonal and so I dropped to just one job for a few months out of the year.  He worked at a convenience store and his schedule was much more stable but that didn't leave much time for us to be together.  So when he came to me with a proposal that could change our money situation, I listened.

     It was late October.  I remember because the trees were already a deep orange and brown and there were so many leaves scattered across the ground everywhere you walked.  The air smelled earthy with a hint of dirt and cool freshness.  The wind had a slight chill that carried leaves along the tree lines. The autumn season was in full swing and I loved that time of year.  This was the only month where we could spend time with each other.  Then one day he came to me with a flyer he had found downtown on a telephone pole.  It was for a research study for sleeping patterns.  And he said it paid eight hundred dollars to just sleep.  I immediately thought that was too good to be true.  Surely there would be some sort of catch.  But he said he had already called them and that all we had to do was sleep in their designated beds with some electrodes attached to our heads.  Seemed simple enough.  But it rarely was.

"It's never that easy James," I told him with stern hesitation.

He sighed  and looked down, "I know babe but I also asked if you could come with me and if we could do it together and they said yes!  And not only that but they said that it would be eight hundred for the each of us.  That's sixteen hundred dollars babe, for just sleeping.  Come on," he said with desperate eyes.

"I know how to do math James.  It just sounds like there's going to be some other thing when we get there," I said trying to loosen myself up to the idea because sixteen hundred dollars would be more than helpful.

"Okay," he said, "how about this.  If it ends up being too complicated or if they spring up some surprise and have us doing some weird shit, then we just leave.  We get up and go.  No harm.  No foul."

"Alright James," I replied knowing full well I had already made up my mind to go with him.  I would go anywhere with him. "but if there's anything..." I added.

"Yes baby! Yes, we will just leave.  But I really feel there won't be.  Let's do it," he said flashing his smile that I loved so much.

"Okay," I replied.

"Awesome! I'll call them back and make an appointment.  This is really going to help with everything in November Lily.  It's going to be great."

     We packed our things and drove to the address that they gave us.  The gig was to spend the weekend there, sleeping Friday night and sleeping Saturday night and then leaving Sunday morning.  They would provide food and amenities; so outside of gas money, everything was covered. We packed a change of clothes, pajamas to sleep in and random things we might need on the drive over.  It was hard to argue with the simplicity of it and not ending up with a check for sixteen hundred dollars.  I tried to calm my nerves.  Telling myself, this is going to help, this is going to help.  But the anxiety ridden girl that had laid dormant for over a year now was rearing her ugly head and I was trying to push it down.  

     The location was about an hour away from the city where we lived.  James was excited but I couldn't shake the nervous notion that something was going to be more complicated than we had anticipated and we were going to come back with nothing but just empty pockets and money lost on gas.  The directions had us on the interstate for about thirty minutes before having us turn to smaller roads that led up into the mountains.  There were pine trees lining both sides of the road so tightly that you could scarcely see the sky.  It was daytime but the trees were packed so tightly that it felt like it was already dark.  

     We drove for another thirty to forty minutes on small winding roads through dense trees as the elevation kept rising.  Up and up we went.  Where we finally reached a front gate.  It was a metal gate that had an intercom to the side of it sticking out of the ground on an angular short metal pole.  You couldn't see any houses or any other signs that anyone even lived out here.  There was just a metal gate surrounded by pine trees tightly packed together.  We pulled up next to the intercom and James pushed the button.  It made a static sound, "Uh, hi.  Uh, we're here for the sleep research study."

Then a voice answered back, "Ah yes,  is this James and Lily?"

"Yes.  It is.  The both of us."

"Excellent.  I'm so glad you came.  Did you bring everything that was required?"

"Yes. Yes we did."

"Perfect," the voice said in a smooth scientist kind of tone.  And then the intercom went silent and the metal gate grated and moaned as it slowly opened.  Letting us through to the thin gravel road that disappeared around a bend behind the pine trees.  James gently drove through the gate and followed the road.  We took it around the bend where it revealed a huge victorian mansion that was completely surrounded by large pine trees.  The mansion itself was a light red with a tower on one side with 3 windows.  It had steep roofs on separate sections that stretched high in triangular shapes.  There was a large chimney with smoke pouring out into the dusk blue sky.  It was a little past dusk by the time we had arrived.  There was also a plain shed to the side that had an open space for parking.  We assumed we could park there.  We got out of the car and opened the trunk.  We started to grab our things when the front door of the mansion opened.  An older man walked out as we closed the trunk of our car.  He looked to be in his late fifties. Quite fit with salt and pepper hair.  He had large glasses that hung at the tip of his nose. We made our way toward the mansion's gorgeous wooden steps.  They led up to a wraparound porch.  

"Welcome," the old man said.  "My name is Arthur." he continued as he extended his hand to shake our own.

"Hello, I'm James, and this is Lily."

"Welcome.  Welcome.  I'm so glad you could come."

"Well, I mean, sixteen hundred dollars is hard to say no to," James said, "that's still the agreement, correct?"

"Yes, yes of course," the old man said, "nothing has changed.  Everything is as it was said."

"So," I said chiming in shyly, "we are just sleeping? That's it?"

"Yes, just sleeping.  I will of course still be conducting my research and that entails certain things but yes, just sleeping.  Why don't you come in, let' s all just get comfortable inside," he said gesturing his hand toward the mansion.

     As we walked in, there were two wooden staircases that had intricate carvings on the posts and the hand rails.  The balusters all had gorgeous flower designs etched into the wood.  In the middle open space hung a chandelier with golden holders that bent upward toward the ceiling.  There were two doorways, one to the left and one to the right.  Both of them double doors and the doors were a heavy amber oak.  The old man led us through the doorway on the right.  He grabbed the two golden doorknobs and pushed the large doors open.

"So this is where we will be conducting the study," he said as he walked through.  "I have set up two beds here.  I hope you don't mind.  I need to have each subject sleeping alone in a bed."

"Not a problem," James said.

"Very well.  And this is what I will be attaching to you," he said holding up electrodes that you would have seen on a hospital patient.  "I will monitor your brain activity with these.  They are specially designed for this very study.  And over there," he said pointing with his thumb and pointer and middle fingers, "is the bathroom.  There is only one bathroom in this room.  But since you will be here the whole weekend, I will show you to the other bathrooms."

"This is very nice," James said, "is it just you?"

"Yes, just me."

There was a part of me that would have loved living in this mansion just by myself.  

"There is a fireplace over here as you can see," he said gesturing to a roaring fire, "and extra wood over here.  Outside of sleeping, you are free to just relax here.  You can venture to other parts of the mansion but only the first floor please.  The upstairs is not allowed.  I hope you understand."

"Yes, of course, Lily?" James said nodding his head.

I also nodded my head in agreement even though I wanted to see the rest of this house.  This was my dream house.  The fire.  The scarlet walls.  The amber oak the mansion was built with.  Everything about this house was what I wished I could have some day but it was a mansion, too far of a reach, but maybe a house like this could happen.  Where James and I could cuddle next to a large fire, reading books and drinking fancy drinks.

     The old man showed us the other rooms and where the bathrooms were and pretty much detailed where we could and could not go.  I found no problem with anything he told us.  Everything about this seemed easy and nothing I wasn't willing to do.  Having only two days there now felt like not enough time.  I loved the mansion.  There was something comforting yet otherworldly about it.

      The time for our first night of sleep was approaching and Arthur began to explain the details of what he needed.  

"You both will lay to sleep at 9pm and I will extinguish the fire.  To facilitate the sleeping process, you both will drink a tea I have specially made for this."

"Wait," I said worried, "are you going to have us take some drugs.  I'm not sure I'm okay with that."

"No, no, no.  No drugs.  This is just to help you sleep.  It's all natural ingredients that I have specifically chosen myself.  I will need to speak to you as you sleep and this will allow you to, um, speak back.  Make you perceptible to the influences of the dreamscape.  I am not simply watching your brain activity for sleeping patterns.  I am watching for when you have accessed the dreamscape.  That is when I will need to speak to you.  And you will need to reply.  As I have gone over earlier, there are cameras set up and microphones.  Everything will be documented and shared with you upon completion if you so desire.  But what we are doing here tonight and the subsequent night, we are exploring the dreamscape.  Not just sleeping.  And this tea helps facilitate certain aspects of the brain that I need to interact with. Are you ready for that?" he said pushing his glasses up.  He had the look of an excited curious teenager.

"I'm okay with this," James said, "I think Lily..." he continued as he looked over at me, "Lily, are you good with this?" he said giving me a look as if telling me, let's not ruin this.

"Yeah.  I'm okay with it.  As long it's not drugs. Then I'm okay with it," I said reluctantly.

"Excellent," Arthur replied. "Okay then, why don't have the both of you get ready for bed."

     Once we both had gotten into our pajamas we made our way to the beds.  They were large queen sized beds and very comfortable. 

"I like to toss and turn.  Is that going to be a problem," I asked.

"Not a problem," Arthur replied from behind a station of computers and cameras.  He walked over with two cups of tea.  "Alright, here you go.  Drink up.  I will be just over there if you need anything," he said as he walked back to his station.

"Bottoms up babe," James said as he gulped down his tea as if he didn't really want to think about the fact that he was drinking something he didn't know. I just nodded my head as I slowly sipped on mine.  It wasn't half bad.  It tasted like something I would make.  I laid myself down to sleep and closed my eyes.  Maybe fifteen or twenty minutes passed before the wash of sleepy haze came over me.  I remember feeling like I was drifting into the best sleep I had ever had.

"Lily, can you hear me?" Arthur said.

"Yes," I replied fully asleep.

"James, can you also hear me?"

James didn't reply.

"Lily, what do you see?" Arthur said turning his attention to me.

"I see....I see, I don't see anything."

"Okay, just let the sleep wash over you.  Go deeper.  Feel more comfortable.  Let it take you."

His voice had a trance like effect.  Like a hypnotist. And I felt myself going deeper into sleep.  Slowly the walls of blackness started to make shapes and washes of colors spread over me before taking shapes in the distance. 

"James, can you hear me?" Arthur asked again.

"Yes, I can hear you," he said finally.
"Good. Lily, are you deeper?"

"Yes."

"What do you see?"

"I can see colors taking shapes.  Things moving.  The black becoming something else."

"What is it becoming Lily?"

"I don't know.  It's like when a blanket is falling over an object and it begins to take shape.  I don't know what it is."

"Okay. And you James, can you see anything?"

Again, James didn't answer.  But I started to see structures.  "Wait," I said. "I see something."

"Yes?" Arthur replied.

"I see dark pyramids taking shape with a moon in a dark sky behind them."

"Yes, yes. And what else?" Arthur said excitedly.

"I can see the sky littered with millions of stars," I continued in a sleepy voice.  "The sky is dark.  There are five pyramids in front of me.  All jet black. I can't see any textures.  No stones or materials.  I think I'm standing in the middle of a road.  There are more buildings to the side of me.  They have doors glowing with dark green and yellow lights pouring out of their windows.  There are things moving inside."
"What else Lily? What else?"

"I'm not sure.  But I'm walking away.  I'm moving toward the pyramids, I don't want to go over there." I said.  I didn't want to go anywhere near whatever was moving inside those buildings.  There was an ominous feeling to them.  "I can see something.  There is a set of stairs that lead downward.  There's a green light illuminating the stairs. I don't know what's down there but I can see shadows moving."

"Go down Lily."
"I don't want to."

"Go down Lily, you must.  See what is there."

"I don't want to. I'm leaving.  I'm turning around," I said afraid.  "I see something else.  There are things standing in the wide road now.  Over by where I was.  They are too far away from me to see what they are.  But they seem to be looking at me."

"Go to them, Lily."

"No.  I don't think they are friendly."

"Please Lily, go to them."

"I see something," James finally says.

"What do you see James?"

"I see....Lily.  I can see you Lily.  I'm waving to you.  Can you see me?"

"Yes...yes I can."

"Fascinating," Arthur said.

I rub my dream eyes before saying "James! I see you. You are standing next to the building with the green windows. I can see you James."

"I can't see any buildings Lily," James replies.  "But I can see you.  There's nothing where I am.  Just darkness."
"See if you can reach Lily, James.  Go to her."

"I will try."

"James, don't.  I see those things watching us."  

What things?" 

"Weird things.  I can't explain what they are but they don't feel friendly."

"I don't see anything Lily."

"Please, don't come over here. I feel they will chase you."

"James.  Go to her," Arthur interjected.

"I'm coming to you Lily.  I don't see anything."

"They started to move.  They're coming James.  They are moving to you now.  Oh shit! Okay, come to me.  But please hurry. Please James."
"I'm coming babe.  But I don't see anything."
"Just run James.  Run."

      My eyes shoot open.  I sit up and look around the room.  Arthur is still sitting at his station watching his monitors but James is not in his bed. 

"Good morning Lily.  How are you feeling?" Arthur asked.

"Where's James," I replied.

"He's fine.  He's just in the other room."

"Show me James now.  I want to see him."

"Now, now.  No need to get frantic.  It was a very successful night.  You both did wonderfully."

"Where is James?"

"I'm right here," he said walking into the room.  "I was just grabbing something to eat.  You were still sleeping."

"What happened?"

"Nothing.  I just woke up.  Arthur told me to grab some food and so I did since you were still asleep."

"Did any of what I saw happen?"

"Yes," Arthur said, "it did happen. From what I can tell.  I monitored you at the precise moment you both went into the dreamscape and documented everything you said.  I have it all on video and recorded.  You both interacted with each other in the dreamscape.  It was marvelous.  Just splendid. How do you feel though?"

"I feel like I haven't slept for a single minute.  The whole thing felt like a few minutes."
"I'm sure it did.  But it is the morning I can assure you," Arthur said.

"The morning? How is that possible?"

"Time works differently in the dreamscape.  A few minutes to you but a few hours out here.  And all happening at the same time," he said as he grabbed a mug of what I would assume was coffee.

"I don't want to do that again," I said.

"Oh, well, we have another night planned Lily," Arthur said putting down his mug.  "And I am afraid you both have already agreed to do it."

James came over to me and knelt down, rubbing my hands. "Babe, it's just one more night.  We need this.  I didn't see anything weird.  It was pretty much normal for me."

"Do you remember seeing me?" I asked.

"Yeah, I do actually.  I remember us waving at each other."

"Me too."

"Isn't that wild.  How is that possible?  Don't you want to know more? I know I do," he said with a smile.  I could never say no to him.  

"Okay," I said.

"Excellent," Arthur said listening to us. "It is fascinating what I witnessed last night.  You both were interacting with each other.  Sharing the same dream per se. It was everything I was hoping for.  But that was just the first step.  Tonight, we will go deeper."

"What happened Arthur?" I asked.  "Explain to me what the hell happened."

"Well Lily," he said standing up from his station.  "I have been researching dreams for most of my life.  I come from a wealthy family so I have had money to do research some would deem not worth throwing money at but I have made some breakthroughs in the past years," he said as he walked around his desk toward the fireplace.   "No one believes my breakthroughs however.  But I'm going to change that.  We. Are going to change that," he said as he knelt down and threw some firewood into the fireplace.  "What we are doing here is the proof that I need for everyone to believe me.  I have believed for many years that sleeping is a doorway," he said rubbing his chinning.  "Perhaps doorway, is too simple a term to describe what is actually happening but I believe consciousness doesn't just exist while you are awake.  But there are other realms of existence.  Other places where sentient thought exists and we can perhaps interact with.  Even possibly find and interact with other people sleeping.  Over large distances.  And what you have shown me last night, that is indeed possible as you both have interacted with each other," he said starting the fire.  He stood up as the orange light from the flames danced on his face, "and we are going to change the world."

     The next night I wanted to sit by the fire before I went to sleep.  I wanted to remember what light looked like.  What heat felt like.  That place with the black pyramids felt so cold.  So alien.  I didn't want to be there again and not remember what here felt like.  In case something happened and I just stayed asleep.  The thought of being there again made me nervous but maybe this time nothing happened.  Maybe it would be like what James experienced.  Just one more night, I thought to myself.

     James and I both went to lay down and drank Arthur's special tea.  Whatever the hell it was.  Maybe he was drugging us and we were hallucinating.  Either way, I just told myself, one more night and we can get our checks and leave.  Just one more night.

     I drank the tea and almost immediately felt the wash of sleep come over me.  

"Amazing," I could hear Arthur say, "she is a natural.  She pulls into the sleep with such ease."

I saw colors dancing in the darkness again.  I saw structures and shapes taking form again.  And I could see the pyramids again.

"I see the pyramids," I said.

"Excellent.  Go to them."

I started walking toward them.  I could see the alien moon in the dark sky again and millions upon millions of stars.  The pyramids were again jet black with no textures.  As I got closer I could see more structures behind them.  There were thousands of them.  Thousands of pyramids laid out on a grid pattern stretching for as far as my eyes could see.

"I see thousands of pyramids.  I see them so far away."

"What else do you see?"

"I can see a city to the east.  Lights.  Green lights.  I think it's a city.  It's not like our cities. I can see things moving.  Hovering in the air.  All the shapes feel wrong.  They look....I can't explain how they look.  It's like how an insect might describe what a shoe looks like.  It's just big but not of our world.  The architecture doesn't follow anything my brain understands.  The buildings are flowing.  Moving."

"How do you mean Lily?" Arthur asked.

"Like, parts of itself are moving through itself.  Like water waves but holding structure.  Like black water with green points of light."

"What else do you see?"

"I see things flying into the sky and disappearing among the dark stars.  There are planets in the distance.  I can see lights on the surface of these other planets."

"Amazing."

"Oh no," I said.

"What? What is it?"

"I can see those things again."
"What do they look like?"

"I'm not sure. They don't have shape. They look like shadows but rippling into itself.  They are moving toward me!" I said in a panic.  "I want to leave."

"Go to them Lily."

"No.  I won't.  They don't feel friendly."

"Go to them," Arthur said frustrated.

"I'll go to them," James said out of nowhere.

"James! Where are you? Don't go.  Please."
"I see you Lily.  I can also see them this time. I can see them moving toward you Lily.  But you don't have to go to them Lily.  I will go."

"No James, please don't," I said in a crying plea.

"Yes James.  Go to them," Arthur said.

"I will."

"James please.  Don't.  I can see you now.  I can see you.  I'm coming to you.  Don't go!"

"It's okay Lily.  It's only a dream.  What can happen. This is amazing.  Don't you want to know more?"

"No I don't.  I just want you."

"It's fine Lily.  If anything happens, just wake me up."

I watched as he walked over to these black shape shifting things.  They had no faces.  No mouths. No arms or legs.  They were just moving shapes of black.  Dark masses that moved toward James.  He reached out to them and touched one of them.  He turned to me with a smile and said, "See, nothing to worry about," before screaming in the real world.  He screamed in agonizing, painful screams. I could hear him outside of the dreamscape, screaming in awful, horrifying screams.  But where I was looking at him, he was still standing there smiling at me with his arm still outstretched to those things.

"Wake me up!  Arthur! Wake me up NOW!" I said screaming.  And I got no answer.  All I could hear was James screaming in agony.  "Wake me up!!"

"Yes Lily, Yes I will.  Give me a moment," I could hear Arthur say. I tried running to James but the distance never closed.  He always stayed the same distance away.  Just smiling that same smile right before he told me there was nothing to worry about.  And then I saw the pyramids crack open as green light began to pour out of the center from the ground to the top of its tip.  The pyramid was splitting open and green light shot up into the sky.  I looked over to James and he was still looking at me smiling but his eyes were bulging.  Like they were about to pop out of his head.  "Please wake me up," I said crying.  I felt as aware of the dreamscape as of Jame's screaming.  Then I looked to the ground and it looked like obsidian glass.  I could see myself reflected in it.  And below me or perhaps it was above me, I saw James.  I could see his body being dragged away from me.  I looked over to where he was standing and he was still standing there but his face was melting and his eyes were gone.  His white smile was a drooping line with his teeth stretching and falling to the ground.  His outstretched arm was being stretched like a sticky piece of gum.  His whole body was being pulled and stretched like a piece of gum toward the pyramids.  Towards their tip where the green light was shooting upwards into the dark starry sky.  I watched as James face pulled and stretched and his mouth pulled open to an impossible amount and stretched into the green light.  And his whole body disappeared into the light, flowing into the sky.  And he was gone.  

     The next thing I remember was Arthur waking me up.  "Lily! Lily! Are you there?! Wake up. Please!" I could hear him say.  I slowly opened my eyes.  My head felt like someone had taken a hammer to it.  I was very groggy and my body felt heavy.  I could barely lift my arms.  I rubbed my face and saw Arthur in front of me.  "Where's James?" I asked.

"He's right over here," he replied.

"Is he okay?"

"Well Lily, I'm not sure," Arthur said.

"What do you mean?" I replied as I looked over to the other bed.  James was lying there with his eyes wide open, unblinking and unmoving, staring at the ceiling.

"What time is it?" I asked Arthur.

"It's 7am.  It's the morning."

"What happened Arthur? What the fuck happened?" I said with growing panic.

"I'm not quite sure Lily.  It was all quite overwhelming and happened quite fast," he said pulling his hand up to his chin.  "James was screaming the most awful screams and I tried to wake him up but nothing I did would do anything. He just screamed with his eyes closed.  I believe he saw something.  There's no way for me to know.  What did you see Lily?"

I slowly got up and went over to James.  "James baby, can you hear me? I'm here.  Wake up baby.  Please."

"What did you see Lily?" Arthur asked again.

"I don't know.  Nothing about what I saw makes any sense in this world."

"Did you see something happening to James?"

"I saw him go to those things," I said crying, "and the last thing he told me was see, nothing to worry about. Then  I saw him reach to them and they fucking took him."
"They took him?" Arthur asked.

"I don't fucking know.  I don't know what they did.  He was just standing there, melting and stretching.  Not moving.  And got sucked into the green light from the pyramid. He was standing there like nothing was happening but I could hear him screaming here.  I could his screams."

"He got pulled into the light?" Arthur asked.  "Fascinating."
"Fascinating?" I said, "No, it's not fascinating.  This is not Fucking Fascinating!!" I shouted.  "You bring him back.  You bring him back right now."

"I'm sorry Lily.  I'm not sure how to do that.  I think James needs medical attention that I can't provide. He is still breathing after all.  He is still here and alive.  At least his body is. And he needs to see a doctor."

"His BODY!" I screamed.  "He is my whole life.  I need him.  You bring him back."

"I can't Lily. I don't know how."

I cried for a moment as I tried to organize my thoughts. I calmly breathed for a few minutes.  Slowly and calmly grabbing my thoughts again.  "What if..." I said before pausing.

"Yes?" Arthur replied.

"What if...I go back under? Do you think I could maybe find him and bring him back?"

"I don't know what's possible Lily.  Perhaps.  Or perhaps the same thing could happen to you."

"I don't care.  I need to bring him back. I need to try."

"We can try Lily.  Yes, we can try," Arthur said with an excited grin.

After a few hours, I pulled myself together and took a shower.  I tried my hardest to get my mind in the right place.  To be in the best mental state I could be in before going back into that place.  I started to write this as a record for anyone that reads it.  In case something happens to me.  So they know what happened. I've instructed Arthur to share this with whomever he's going to share his findings with in case I am lost to that god forsaken place.  I have to follow.  I have to. I have to find him.  I can't live my life without him.  I'm going back to sleep now.  Arthur has just handed me the cup of tea.  He's been instructed to write anything after I'm finished here that he sees or wants to add.  Wish me luck.  I'm going to find James.

-Lily

It happened again.  There was nothing I could do.  

-Arthur

The Sudden Silence

"The Sudden Silence"

He sat in his favorite spot like he normally did outside the restaurant.  He liked to people watch.  He would order old Tennessee whiskey on the rocks and a plate of french fries.  And he would sit outside and watch the people as they passed by, casually sipping his drink and picking at his fries.  He liked the smooth caramelly burn of the whiskey in his throat under a warm sun.  An earthy, cedar like taste that filled his nostrils as he sipped.

     He would take at least three or four sips before he did his first jump.  He would look around and find anyone that looked interesting for him to jump inside their minds.  Today, he wanted to start with something simple.  He saw a child, probably five years old walking with his mom.  Let's start there today, he thought.  He stared at the child for a moment before he felt a click inside his mind.  Something in his mind would lock on with the other person, like a key entering a keyhole.  He didn't know exactly how it worked but it had become second nature for him to do.  Almost like breathing.  He would just concentrate and his mind would connect to the other person's mind.  

     He jumped inside the child's head and could hear all the thoughts the child was thinking in that moment.  Look at the flowers, oh wow, those are nice.  I should tell my mom. Mom, mom, look, mom.  He could hear the child's inner thoughts as he watched him from where he was sitting.  It wasn't mind control.  He couldn't make the person do anything.  And he couldn't communicate with them in this state either.  The only thing he could do was listen.  As long as he could see them, he could hear their inner thoughts.  Whatever they were thinking in that moment.  He had never seen memories or past thoughts. Nothing like that.  Just their inner voice. 

     When he first discovered he could do this, it was terrifying.  He thought he was losing his mind.  Hearing thoughts that weren't his made him feel like he had lost his grip on reality.  The first time it ever happened, he had accidentally done it to his mother.  He was fourteen at the time.  He was angry with her.  She had just told him he couldn't go hangout with his friends until his chores were done.  They argued and he ended up just staring at her angrily.  That's when his mind clicked with hers and out of nowhere he could hear the voice of his mother inside his head.  Even as she just stood there silently he could hear, Ugh, I hate when you look at me like that.  Bratty kid.  Just do what I'm telling you and you can go hangout with your friends.

"What did you say?" he asked his mom.

She looked at him confused, "I didn't say anything."

"I heard you, what were you saying," he said growing frustrated because he knew he had heard her voice.  Why was she lying to him.

"Jacob, I didn't say anything..." What is this now, is he trying to annoy me on purpose. Just go do your chores...sometimes I swear, he's such a handful. 

He could hear both of her words at the same time.  It was a jumbled mess.  It took years for him to figure out what was happening.  But it was terrifying at the beginning.  He thought the demons he read about in the bible or saw in movies were real and they had found him.  Like he couldn't control his own thoughts.  Then he finally realized that was because the voices he was hearing were other people's thoughts.  That took many, many years to figure out.  And it took just as many to figure out how to control this ability naturally.  It seemed pretty useless for a time.  Most of the time, he didn't want to hear other people's thoughts.  Most people were just selfish assholes that complained about others constantly and thought about things they wished they could say out loud but never do.  He realized later that he could use the information he heard to smooth talk his way into getting things or getting out of things.  Like one time, how he had gotten out of a parking ticket.  

     He had stayed inside the restaurant for too long and forgot about the parking meter.  As he came back to his car, the meter maid had just started writing the ticket.  Usually once they get their pen out, that's it, there is no getting out of the ticket.  But he had an advantage.  He could hear what she was thinking.  He walked up casually and jumped into her head.  She was attractive.  She had a small, tight frame and long, silky hair.  Gorgeous face but she looked like she had a long day.  He could here her thinking this sign is mostly covered, I could just give them a warning.

He would start there.  He then asks her, "oh no, can you please just give me a warning this time?"

"No, I don't think so," she said but thinking at the same time, you are cute, hmm, maybe if you had told me you couldn't see the 2 hour parking limit sign, then just maybe.

"I couldn't see the parking sign," he then said immediately.

She continued to think to herself, I'm usually never patrolling this area anyway, she thought, and it is covered.  If they contest it, the judge is just going to throw the ticket out. But, I just finished writing the date though...I don't know.

"Look, I just started writing..." she began before he interjected.

"I bet it's only the date though," he replied in a quick smooth manner as he flashed her a friendly smile.

Her minded drifted for moment to his looks. She thought, he is kinda cute.  Too bad I'm working.  It's been a hell of a day and could go for a drink.  I'm almost off too.  And I just got these earrings and could use a drink.  Too bad.

"Those are lovely earrings," he said.

"Oh," she said a bit surprised, "Thank you," she replied as she lifted her hand away from the blank ticket pad and gently touched her earrings.  

It was working.  He just had to keep smooth talking her.  It was fun for him.

"They look gorgeous," he said. "They look very well taken care of," he said trying to steer the conversation away from the ticket.

"Yeah, well, I just got these, actually" she said smiling.

"Well, they are beautiful," he said know full well she had just gotten those.  He had been listening to her thoughts after all. "You have good taste," he continued.  "Sounds like they need to be taken out for a drink then.  Listen, why not let me save the money I was going to have to spend on this ticket and let me spend it on you instead?  What time are you off?"

Wow, he's a smooth talker, she thought to herself.  Any other day she would have said no but today had been hell for her and there was nothing wrong with having a drink with someone, she thought.

"I bet today has been a long day for you," he said, "let me treat you."

Damnit, she thought.  What the hell.  "Okay, why not.  I'm off in thirty minutes.  How about you leave your car parked here and I won't give you a ticket.  And I'll meet you here in about thirty five minutes."

"Sounds perfect," he said giving her that smooth smile she already liked so much.

     Later that night, they both had a few drinks and talked and he knew the exact perfect response for almost everything she said.  It was easy when he could hear what she was thinking. They went back to her place.  Took off each other's clothes as they stumbled through her front door, kissing and rubbing and groping each other.  They had sex that night.  It was the best sex she ever had.  Because he could hear exactly what she wanted at any given moment.  He could hear what she liked and didn't like.  And then, he left in the morning.

*****

     Knowing people's thoughts made it easy to have one night stands like that.  It also made having conversations really easy.  He knew how to connect with people so they liked you.  He could even manipulate people if he wanted to.  If you got good enough at reading their social cues, their anxieties and intentions, combined with listening to their inner thoughts, you could manipulate anyone. But he didn't like to do that to anyone though. Even if he liked to try to smooth talk. Most people are already being manipulated by someone in their life.  He didn't need to another person doing that to them.  Plus, he wasn't trying to change anyone's life.  He just liked to jump in and out of people's minds quickly.  Keep it simple and leave it at that, he thought.  That was his rule.  However, he did intervene into a child's life once.  Breaking his rule.

     He had just randomly jumped into a nine year old girl's mind one day, that was walking with her mother.  He was just people watching like he normally did and she had looked unnaturally sad.  Too sad for a normal nine year old.  It made him curious.  He clicked his mind and jumped into the little girl's thoughts.  It wasn't obvious at first to hear any kind of reason for why she was so distraught because he was only listening to her thoughts that she was thinking right at that moment.  It was just normal, random nine year old kid stuff.  I want ice cream.  I want mommy to buy me a toy.  Things like that.  But then he saw it.  Her father had returned from wherever he was and joined the mother and daughter.

Oh no.  Daddy's back. I don't like how he looks at me when we're outside.  I don't want people to know that he touches me down there.  Mommy would be mad at me if she found out.  No one would believe me, that's what Daddy says.  I wish he wouldn't look at me when we're outside.

     He was horrified when he heard.  He saw the silent sadness of this girl's face and it sank his heart into the deepest depths of grief and anger.  Knowing what was happening to this little girl made his entire soul catch on fire.  He didn't know what to do.  He didn't know how to help this little girl but he couldn't just ignore it and walk away.  He had to do something. He desperately tried thinking of something but nothing came to mind.  So he instead he went over to the three of them and walked behind them for a few minutes.  He clicked his mind and jumped into the father's mind.

Now where are we going? I'm tired of being out.  She never makes up her fucking mind.  Where is this old run down hag taking me now.  I can get better than her.  I can get younger too.  Can't she just buy her fucking shoes or whatever already and be done.  

     Jacob's blood boiled.  This guy wasn't saying anything he could use to help this little girl.  All he knew was that he really hated his wife.  He listened for a few more minutes.  Fuck, this day has been only about her, her, her. I'm stressed out and tired.  I think I'm going to need my little stress reliever tonight, he thought to himself.  The father then looked at the little girl and smirked.  Anger began overwhelming Jacob's entire body.  He couldn't let this disgusting piece of shit go without getting something that would help him help this little girl.  But there was nothing.  He felt helpless.  What could he do?  So he just blurted out "Hey, don't I know you?"

The father turned around looking at him confused, "You talking to me?" he replied.

"Yeah.  Don't I know you?" Jacob continued.

"No bud, I don't think we know each other,"  What's this guy's problem.

"Aren't you Hank from over on Dearborn street?" he said hoping he would reveal his name to him.

"No man, I'm not Hank from over on Dearborn street," This guy needs to get the fuck out of my face or else.  

"Or else what," Jacob said.

"What did you say?" he said confused.

"Fuck!.....oh shit, I'm sorry," Jacob said as he covered his mouth.  "You probably don't like swearing in front of her," he said gesturing to the little girl.

The mother then replied, "it's okay.  Come on Harry, let's go.  Here Holly, grab my hand."

"Harry! That's right.  Harry.  Now I remember."

"Yeah, let's go," Harry said.

"I'll be seeing you soon Harry.  You ladies have a great day."

What the fuck was that about.  Too bad I was with the girls or else I would have fucked him up, Harry thought.

"Sure you would have Harry.  Sure you would," Jacob replied so that he could hear him.  Harry just stared back at him in confusion.

     After the family had left the area, he followed them to their home.  He wanted to know where this Harry fuck lived.  He had to do something.  He had no evidence that would help this little girl and the police weren't going to just take his word for it.  He knew they weren't going to do anything.  He could call CPS but that could take a long time and he had no relationship with the family.  They would ask more questions about him than about them.  He had to think of something. Don't worry Holly, I'm going to help you, he told himself. I'm not going to let him hurt you.

     He then left and returned to the house as the sun was going down.  He had come up with a plan and needed the cover of darkness.  He had gotten a few things when he left and made a few phone calls.  He had given the address and full name of Harry to a small organization that hunts and catches predators like him.  They could hunt him after he was done with his plan tonight.  They could keep a watch for him.  Maybe even get him to go to prison.

     He waited in his car to get dark.  He watched the house but because all the windows had the curtains closed and he could see no one, he couldn't mind jump.  It was a two story house with the type of windows that you lifted to open.  They had a side wooden fence that led to the backyard.  That's where he would enter, he thought.  He grabbed the black ski mask he bought earlier and grabbed a crowbar and a pair of brass knuckles.  The brass knuckles were illegal in this state but his friend had got him a pair for his birthday.  But that's another story.

     He got out of his car and quickly made his way across the dark street toward the house.  He then hopped over the fence and looked at all the windows on the side.  He was going to have to break one of them.  He searched for the perfect one to break as he hid in the shadows.  He crept around the house being very careful to stay in the shadows.  He was dressed in all black.  The family it seemed, had all went to bed already.  He just needed a perfect way to get in.  And just then, Harry walked outside through the back sliding door.  He didn't notice Jacob.  He couldn't.  He was completely hidden within the shadows just beyond the edge of the light.  

     Harry was having a cigarette.  He pulled out a pack, slid one out and lit it.  He inhaled deep before tilting his head back and exhaled toward the sky.  I should take him now, Jacob thought but stopped himself.  He was going to wait until he turned to go back inside.  He didn't want to do it outside.  What if the neighbors heard.  He was going to get him as he finished his cigarette and walked back inside.  As he waited, he jumped inside his mind.  He wanted to hear this fucker's thoughts.  He stared at him with anger in his eyes and his mind clicked.  He was inside this man's head.

Fuck, what a day, he thought.  I need some release.  I'll make a drink first and then wake up Holly.  Yeah.  That's a good idea.  Janet is already dead asleep.  She won't hear anything.  She never does.  I'm usually really quiet.  And Holly doesn't make a sound.  She's a good girl.  Daddy's little good girl.

      Jacob could feel his anger building inside him like a raging fire.  He could barely control the rage.  He could feel his fists tightening until his knuckles were white.  Harry took his last drag of his cigarette and threw it on the ground and stepped on it.  And just as he turned and opened the sliding door, Jacob came up from behind him and hit the back of his head with the crowbar.  Harry collapsed to the ground spraying blood across the kitchen counter and ripping out tufts of hair.  Harry fell face first to the ground and slowly turned over to see his attacker.

"What the fuck?" he said in a groggy voice.

"Shut the fuck up!" Jacob shouted.

"What's going on?" Harry said in a scared voice.

"I said shut up!" Jacob said screaming again.

"I have money.  You want money.  I have it.  Take it," he said as he started crying pathetically.  He looked like a scared little rich boy thinking he could buy his way out of this.  Fuck this man Jacob thought. 

"No Harry, I don't want your fucking money."

"Take anything. Just don't hurt me," he said as he slobbered over himself as he cried.

The pathetic way he was crying and pleading and begging just made Jacob angrier.  He wanted to beat this man to death.  What a weak, pathetic person, Jacob thought.

"Don't hurt you?" Jacob asked, "You want Me, not to hurt You?" Jacob continued in a tone of disbelief.  "And what about Holly? Who's going to keep her safe from you?" and as Jacob said that the mother came down the stairs.

"What's going on? Harry, what is this? Who are you?" she said in a panicked tone.

"Don't worry about me," Jacob said raising the crowbar toward her.  "Did you know what he was doing to Holly?"

"What?" she replied in confusion.

"What. He." Jacob repeated moving the crowbar back and pointing it at Harry.  "Was doing. To. Holly?"

"I don't know what you are talking about," she said as she started crying.  "What was he doing to her?  What do you want from us?"

Jacob then clicked on his mind and jumped into hers.  She was running wild with so many questions and genuine confusion.  She really didn't know what Harry was doing to Holly.  He jumped out and told her, "I'm here because this piece of shit has been molesting your daughter Holly.  And I wasn't going to let that happen anymore.  Don't ask me how I know.  I just know.  And he's not going to get away with it anymore," he said refocusing his attention to Harry.

"I have never done anything to Holly," Harry cried out with his arms outstretched trying to beg.  Jacob just looked at him and calmly pulled out his brass knuckles.  He slid them over his fingers all the way to the knuckles.  Harry saw him put them on and began to sob like a baby, begging for Jacob to listen to him.

"Oh God! Please! No! Please! Please sir.  I'll do anything."

And Jacob just calmly grabbed him by his shirt collar and began punching his face.  He swung down hard as the brass knuckles connected to Harry's face.  Breaking teeth.  Ripping flesh from his cheeks.  Jaw bones splitting apart.  Harry's face was barely recognizable once Jacob was done.

"You're never going to touch Holly or anyone else ever again.  You HEAR ME!! SAY IT!!" Jacob screamed.

Harry could barely see through his swollen eyes.  Waves of blood ran down over his face and open flesh hung loosely.  His mouth was spilt open. His lips could barely move as normal lips.  He mumbled out what sounded like I will ever touch her again.

And then Jacob continued, "Or I'll be back Harry.  And I won't be nice like this time.  I will hurt you worse," he said as he pulled off Harry's pants and underwear.  "But before I'm done here," he continued as he pulled out a large rubber band.  He then grabbed Harry's testicles the way you would grab a dog's or a pig's to neuter them.  He twisted them inside his fist and wrapped the rubber band around Harry's balls.  "Tonight, you gotta pay Harry, you gotta pay with your balls," he said as he quickly sliced off both of Harry's testicles.  Letting them fall to the floor in a wet flop.  Harry screamed in agony. "Next time you pay with your dick, you hear me, you fucking piece of shit." He then looked up at the mother and said, "Watch your girl."  And just like that left out the back and they never saw him again. 

*****

     That was years ago and today, he just wanted to people watch.  Simple things.  He still checks in on children to make sure nothing bad is happening from time to time but admittedly, that event with Holly had changed him.  He had felt things about himself he never felt before.  Things he came to know that he never knew he was capable of and deep down, he liked it.  He liked unleashing pent up anger he felt from a world that he couldn't relate to anymore.  People were ugly, selfish creatures that were capable  of horrible, awful things even if the intentions were good.  After all, his intentions were good.  But what he did to that man, even if he deserved it, was raw, unfiltered awful anger that could be manipulated toward anything.  Someone could use what he felt for their own advantage.  Those types of emotions never benefit anyone in the end.  He had crossed a line and he knew it.

     Ever since that day, he had decided to never intervene in other people's lives again.  It was a hard choice but deep down, he felt it was the right one.  He just sips his whiskey and eats his french fries now.  A habit he has grown to do that he quite enjoys.  But he is nothing if not curious.  And today there is a man standing on the sidewalk completely still with a blank look on his face.  A look that almost appeared dead.  People passing him just ignored him because when you see someone like that you usually don't try to interact with them.  Don't want to get pulled into something you don't want to be a part of.  Maybe he was a drug addict.  Maybe he was sick.  Who knows, he thought.  He took a sip of whiskey and let the smokey burn into his nostrils and let the curiosity overtake him before concentrating.  He let his mind click and he jumped into the man's mind.  

     It was blank.  Not a single thought.  It sounded like how the world sounds when you're underwater.  Just a muffled, watery sound.  No words.  No ideas.  No intents or emotions.  He couldn't hear a thing.  He had never encountered that.  This was new to him.  There was something wrong with this man.  He searched deeper into this man.  Searching for anything, a whisper, a thought.  But he seemed to be absolutely empty.  Just a vast, infinite soundscape of nothingness.  Any thoughts this man had were so far into the void that there was nothing left of him here on this plane of reality.

      Then suddenly, the man's head started moving from side to side as if he was looking for something.  Or someone.  He kept searching until finally his head turned toward Jacob.  This man's eyes found him and stared at Jacob sitting across the way with his whiskey and fries.  Jacob made eye contact with the man.  He couldn't believe it.  Why was he looking at him, he thought.  Could he somehow feel Jacob inside his head? What was going on? This also had never happened to him before.  It was strange.  He started to feel panic and decided it was time to leave this man's mind.  But there was something wrong.  He couldn't.  He pulled but his mind wouldn't let go.  He pulled again but it felt stuck.  Like how it feels when you go fishing and your fishing line gets stuck under some rocks.  He couldn't come back.  He couldn't separate.  Then he heard it.  A voice.

"We see you Jacob."

His eyes widened with fear.  The man was now staring at him with bulging, hungry eyes and a malevolent smile.

"We can hear your thoughts Jacob.  They betray you.  They have already given us all we need to know."

Jacob tried desperately to silence his mind.  He didn't know what was happening but he knew that he was in a dangerous situation.  One he had never dealt with before.

"Oh, how you have lived for so long enjoying the gift you have been given without having to pay any kind of price for it.  Tsk, tsk, tsk.  Well, we're here to tell you that there is a price to pay Jacob.  Oh yes, there is a price." It said with a hungry, ravenous tone. Like a hungry snake, slithering around its prey. Salivating on the thought of swallowing Jacob whole at any moment.  Whatever this thing was, he needed to get away.  He tried pulling again but just couldn't get out of this man's mind.

"Oh no Jacob.  There is no escaping.  We have you in our grips," it said sounding almost like it was licking its lips.  "We have you and do not plan to let you go.  What a tasty treat too.  You will join the rest of them.  Deep down there. Becoming another voice screaming into the infinite void.  Oh what beautiful singing they make," it said as the man began to slowly walk toward Jacob.  "You hear that," it continued, "that muffled, watery sound.  Those are the screams of so many others that we have eaten.  And you will join them Jacob.  You are next. We are going to eat you."

Jacob got up from the table and started to hurriedly walk away.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Jacob just needed to get far enough away, he thought. That's all and he would sever the tie.  Cut them out.  Just like how he does it when he can't see the person he jumps in to.  

"Oh, you think if we can't see you then you will escape," it said amused. "Oh Jacob, you still had so much to learn and you wasted it on feeble, selfish things.  We know.  We can see."

How could it read his mind.  It knew things he wasn't thinking.  Whatever this thing was had capabilities far beyond his own. 

"What the hell are you?" Jacob finally asked from inside his mind.

"We are an ancient being.  Old gods. Consciousness with no boundaries," it said as the empty man followed.

"What the hell do you want with me?" Jacob asked frantically.

"There are so many like you Jacob.  So many who have your gift.  And none of you even know how to communicate with each other.  All unworthy of such gifts."

Jacob hurried back to his car trying to get as far away from the strange man as he could.

"We don't want your flesh Jacob.  That already belongs to another god.  A hellish being.  A price you will pay in blood for the body you have.  It is not a kind god.  From flesh and blood and pain you come, so with flesh and blood and pain you will return.  Nothing is free Jacob.  We just want the part of you that makes you...well, you." 

Jacob could almost hear its lips drooling.  If it even had any.

"What, like my soul? You want my soul?" Jacob asked.

"Yes, you call it that.  But it is so much more than that.  Human beings have barely discovered the tips of their awareness.  The horrors of the cosmos are much, much deeper.  And there are plenty of hungry things out there."

Jacob finally got into his car, turned it on and drove away. But he could still somehow hear the voice in his head.

"There's nowhere to go Jacob. There is only one way this will end.  You found us.  Remember that.  Your soul was too curious and fell into our trap.  An empty mind," it said letting out what sounded like a small chuckle.  "You can have your flesh and blood.  That does not belong to us.  But your sentience. That is ours.  You will have the thin veil of thought just like everyone else.  You will exist inside your own mind just like everyone else.  But we will eat that part of you that can share consciousness.  We eat that part as you are born.  We eat it so deliciously.  But every so often, one of you slips by. You slipped by. It is now time to pay Jacob.  Time to pay your price for such gifts."

And right then Jacob saw a white flash of light and he felt his mind being pulled away from himself until he felt something ripping.  Something existential.  It pulled him apart and then he couldn't see and drove into a telephone pole.

     Jacob woke up later in a hospital.  They said everything was normal and that he hadn't suffered any serious injury.  But everything wasn't normal.  Maybe normal for them but not for Jacob.  Something was lost.  He could feel it.  He couldn't jump his mind anymore.  He couldn't hear anyone else's thoughts.  He existed just inside his own.  He could no longer connect.  A panic of isolation washed over him and he broke down and cried.  He cried hard.  Slobbering over himself as his tears dripped to the ground.  He cried until he couldn't breath.  He felt more alone than at any point in his life.  

     As the years have gone by, he has come to terms with life without his gift.  He still gets random noise in his head that doesn't belong to him.  Random whispers that aren't his.  And the watery, muffled, underwater sound still haunts him.  Gives him nightmares.  But the worst part, and he can't be sure of this, is that he can hear himself sometimes screaming out for help from somewhere far off, in desperate pathetic pleas. He can hear himself begging.  Saying "I'll do anything.  Please.  Please.  Just let me go." He doesn't want to know if what he hears is real or if he has just been sitting in silence for too long with his own thoughts.

The Quiet Girl

It was a night like any other night.  A night she had done a million times before.  She was alone again.  Like usual.  Searching to pull any kind of happy moment from another wasted day amongst the bottom rungs of another dark night.  She hadn't done anything today again. Like so many other days before today. She spent most of the day sleeping.  Just waking up to go to the bathroom and then back to sleep.  She wasn't much a cook either, so she would just eat whatever was in the fridge.  She usually just cut up raw carrots and lettuce.  No cooking required.  She was like a rabbit, she thought.  Yeah, a lonely, pathetic rabbit who never left its cage.  She did go antiquing from time to time.  It was her only hobby. But she rarely found the motivation to do it anymore.  

     She did find a nice, quaint shop about a week ago at the edge of town.  Hidden amongst a neighborhood.  Pickman's curiosities and relics it was called.  It looked like a little house on the outside.  There were no other businesses around.  It was nestled in between two larger homes.  She had walked by, wandering through random neighborhoods as she did sometimes because she didn't have a car.  One could have easily missed the place if not for a tiny sign sitting in the front lawn.  Pickman's curiosities and relics.  Please, do come in, it read.  The front door was of amber and a heavy red oak.  She turned the golden doorknob and as she pushed the door open, a little bell sitting above the door jingled.  Announcing to the shop keeper that a prospective buyer had entered. 

     An old man sat behind a desk with an old fashioned register sitting beside him.  He wore small clear glasses attached to a gold chain that hung loosely around his neck.  She assumed it was for hanging his glasses on his chest when he took them off.  He had a head full of grey hair and looked to be in his seventies or eighties.  He was reading a book when he heard the jingle. He looked up from behind his book and tilted down his glasses and said in an old, kind tone, "hello, young lady, let me know if there is anything I can help you with," and just like that, went back to reading his book.

"Thank you," she replied and she began wandering the tightly packed aisles.  There were shelves so packed with trinkets and oddities that there was no more space for any new things to fit.  There were bookshelves filled with old dusty looking books.  Glass display cases that held what looked like old mummified hands.  Golden necklaces, talismans and the occasional silver bracelet. 

     So many new things she had never seen before.  She meandered passed low sitting tables, heavy cabinets, mirrors, dishes and old artwork.  The shop had an old world smell.  Like wet wood and moss.  It wasn't very bright inside.  She wandered through like she was walking through a garden full of beautiful flowers.  Letting the tips of her fingers gently brush everything.

     She was enamored with the hidden history of every object.  Every little trinket was perhaps even older than she was.  Perhaps by decades, maybe even centuries.  She loved the idea that she existed in the midst of so many old relics.  Things that had seen so much.  Much more than she had experienced in her entire life.  These oddities and relics had been to so many parts of the world.  Even this little golden ring she picked up.  This has probably seen the sunsets in Italy, she thought, or the golden sandy shores of Greece.  Or maybe it has been laying for centuries at the bottom of the sea, seeing all manner of sea creatures no human as ever seen.  The possibilities were endless.  And she loved all of it.

     She navigated through the twist and turns of the labyrinth like aisles until she reached the very back of the shop.  And there she saw it.  A cute, silver, amulet necklace.  It had a thin silver chain and the amulet itself opened up where you could put two small pictures inside.  It was empty though.  There were no pictures there now.  She didn't have anyone to put in there anyway.  But she did really like it.  When she picked it up, she instantly felt a connection to the amulet.  She needed to have it. It was beautiful.

     She carefully turned it over searching for a price tag.  She inspected the engravings on the front and back.  They looked like flowery patterns and swirls.  It felt nice to touch..  But there was nothing attached to the amulet or the silver chain telling her how much it cost.  She made her way back to the front of the shop to where the old man was sitting.

"Excuse me sir," she said in almost a scared whisper.  She got nervous when she talked to people.  She had a stutter growing up that she worked really hard to get rid of but it sometimes came out when she got nervous. "H-how much for this?" she continued as she handed the old man the amulet necklace.  He grabbed one end of his glasses and held them as he inspected the necklace. 

"Oh, this is beautiful," he said in his old man voice.  "Let's see, lets see here, hmmm," he continued as he looked around it, also searching for a price tag that was not there.  How strange, he thought, he put price tags on everything in that shop himself.  Perhaps he missed one.  He would have to appraise it in the moment or else he could lose a potential buyer.  There hadn't been much business for such a long time.  So he did his best to come up with a good price.  "There doesn't seem to be a price," he said, "let's see,"  he continued as he walked behind a computer screen.  He pretended to research prices from a database that didn't exist.  She wouldn't know.  She couldn't see the computer screen.  He was just clicking random links and folders, just giving himself enough time to figure out a price he liked but also one she would pay.

"How about forty dollars?" he finally said.

She didn't like that price and the old man could see it on her face.  He acted quickly and said, "But how about for you..." rubbing his chin, "twenty dollars?"

She liked that price much better and smiled.  "I'll take it," she said before he changed his mind.

"Great!" the old man replied.  "I'll bag it up for you."

He grabbed a brown paper bag and a small case for the necklace and placed it inside the bag.  He folded the top neatly and handed it to her with two hands.

****

      That was a week ago.  The amulet necklace lay sitting on top of her dresser now, in front of a large mirror that also sat atop.  She hadn't really gone outside since then.  Except for work or to get groceries, she had stayed inside.  Nighttime was when she felt most comfortable anyway.  But she didn't really like going out when it was dark.  The world was asleep and even though she was still inside, she felt no one would notice her at night.  She listened to everything with headphones on and watched TV with headphones on.  She didn't bother anyone.  She was a quiet tenant.  Never disturbed anyone.  But tonight was different.  Tonight, she didn't feel as invisible as she usually felt.  Almost like something was watching her.

     She didn't notice at first, but as she watched television with her headphones on, things were moving around her.  Things that shouldn't be moving.  Things that usually stay in place after you set them down.  An empty glass in the kitchen was sliding slightly across the counter without her noticing.  Some pens rolled on the desk next to the wall.  Strange things were happening and she didn't notice any of it.

     She was watching her show while eating some popcorn from a bowl when she finally had to get up to go pee, so she paused her show, took off her headphones and went to the bathroom.  It was while she was washing her hands that she noticed her hair brush wasn't where she remembered leaving it.  Weird, she thought.  Maybe she just didn't remember moving it.  In either case, she paid no mind to it.  She sat back down and grabbed her headphones but before putting them back on, she looked strangely at the television.  It looked crooked.  At just the slightest angle.  Like it was tilted to one side.  Has she never noticed that before?  How could she never notice that? It wasn't crooked by very much but it was enough to notice and now that she had noticed it, she couldn't unsee it.  She got up and inspected the television stand.  It was level.  Seemed normal.  She then leaned her head behind the TV, examined the sides, slid her hand up and down the border of the screen.  Everything looked fine.  But why did it look crooked?  She couldn't watch her show until she fixed this issue.  She decided she was going to get some paper towels to place underneath the TV stand so that the picture would look level again.  It was an odd thing to stress over but it was something she couldn't let go.

     She went to the kitchen and noticed the empty glass on the counter.  Did I leave this right here, she thought.  Hmm, whatever.  She grabbed some paper towels and folded them carefully. She went back to the TV and lifted one side very gently and slid the folded paper towels underneath.  That should do it, she said to herself.  She stood back and took a quick look at the TV.  Perfect.  Okay, much better.  She turned around and sat back down on the couch and just as she was about to put her headphones back on she saw that the TV was crooked again.  What the hell, she thought.  I just saw it, it wasn't crooked.  I just fixed the damn thing.  She rubbed her eyes.  Maybe I'm just tired.  Maybe it's time to go to bed, she thought.

      She wouldn't notice it at the time but the picture frames sitting on the shelves behind her were moving very slightly while she was rubbing her eyes, trying to figure out her TV situation.   She looked at the TV and it was now tilted slightly to the left because of the paper towels she had placed underneath.  She removed them from under the TV and set the TV back down.  It wasn't crooked anymore.  It never was.  Her eyes were playing tricks on her.  I think it might be time to go to bed, she thought.  She stood up and as she did she felt a little nauseous.  So she sat back down.  Oh no, did I eat something bad, she thought immediately. Was it the lettuce I ate earlier?  I had heard there was a recall on lettuce. Was it contaminated, she wondered.  She sat for a moment, hoping it would go away soon and just then out of the corner of her eye she saw the small lamp on the desk slide.  It wasn't a far distance that it moved but she certainly saw it move.  She was sure of it.  She got up and walked toward the lamp and it was sitting slightly crooked. So it wasn't just her imagination. She stared at it.  She pushed it back in alignment with the rest of the desk.  She tried to figure out how it had moved.  Maybe she had rats.  She got shivers thinking about a rat scurrying across the floor by her bare feet.  God I hope not, she thought.  But maybe there Was a rat and it tugged on the cord that led to the power outlet.  She took a step back and looked underneath the desk.  There was nothing there.  

     She started to get a cold shiver that ran up her spine.  She decided to go lay in bed.  How did that lamp move, she kept thinking.  And slowly an eeriness began to creep into her mind.  Like a slow moving fog coming off the hills.  It seemed to fill the room.  She started turning off all the lights but kept one on in the living room.  Tonight, she didn't feel completely comfortable sleeping in complete darkness.  She laid down and pulled the blanket over her legs.  She looked at the picture hanging on the wall beside her closet.  She blinked a few times and rubbed her eyes.  She couldn't believe it.  It was also crooked.  It gave her shivers all across her body.  Get a grip Jessica, she told herself.  She was letting her intrusive thoughts get the better of her.  She closed her eyes and dragged both her hands down her face as she let out a few long, dry breaths of air.  Inhale.  Exhale. In...hale. Foooo.  Ex...hale. Foooo.  She took a few deep breaths and opened her eyes.  She was feeling better and then she looked at the picture again.  It wasn't crooked anymore.  Was she seeing things?  Had her depression and isolation finally make something crack inside her mind.  Nothing like this had ever happened to her before.

     She got up to go get a glass of water.  Once she got into the kitchen she noticed the empty glass from before had been moved again.  Did she move it last time?  She couldn't remember.  She must have.  She didn't want to believe the other explanation.  She grabbed the Brita filtered water pitcher from the fridge and grabbed a fresh new glass from the cupboard.  She poured  her water and headed back to bed.  As she walked away she could hear a soft sliding sound behind her.  She stopped immediately.  She slowly turned her head around while holding her breath.  She waited.  The apartment was dark except for the single light she left on.  She listened for the soft, sliding sound again.  There it was!  Something was moving in the kitchen.  Oh god, I hope it's not a rat, she immediately thought.  She slowly walked back with her eyes vigilant to any movement or for anything out of place.  What was she looking for? She didn't know.  She stared intently into the dark kitchen.  There!  The empty glass.  It moved.  It slid across the counter.  She turned on the light.  It didn't slide far but it definitely moved.  And actually, it's still moving. What...the....hell, she said out loud as she watched the empty glass sliding.  Nothing she could see was causing the glass to move.  What was going on?  She went to grab her phone to record what she was seeing and as she turned on the screen, there was a face of an old woman screaming with a painful look on her face.  With her teeth spread apart, yellow and decaying.  She dropped her phone.  What the fuck was that?  She stood silently for a few moments trying to understand what she just saw.  Her lockscreen usually had some anime character on it, she knows, she carefully chooses them to put as her wallpaper.  

     Someone must have hacked her phone, she thought.  Oh no, she might need to do a factory reset on her phone.  She slowly picked up her phone and hesitated for a moment before turning on her screen again.  It was back to normal.  Her anime character was still there and the time and date read correctly.  Or did it.  The time was correct but where the day should show said, "Festering, 66, 1408."  What the hell did that mean?  She rubbed her eyes with her fingers and opened them again and the date now said "Torture, 25, 1211." She rubbed them again and again it said something different.  It read "You're going to burn."  She turned the screen off and tossed the phone on the couch.  What the hell was going on? Was someone fucking with her?  Maybe it was that nauseous feeling from earlier.  Maybe she got some kind of food poisoning and now she was hallucinating.  She didn't see what she saw.  No way.  And the empty glass, that also wasn't moving either.  

     Just then, a loud crashing sound startled her.  It was the sound of glass shattering behind her.  She turned around quickly and went to the kitchen. There it was, on the floor in a million glass shards.  The empty glass that certainly wasn't moving before.  But if it wasn't moving, then how did it end up on the floor, shattered.  She stared at the pieces for a few moments.  Dread and fear began to take over.  That eeriness that filled the room before had begun to seep into her emotions.  She didn't feel like she was alone anymore.  There felt to be some kind of presence in the apartment now, with her.  Something didn't feel right.  There was only silence lingering in the air as she slowly looked around the apartment.  She wanted to see if anything else weird was happening.

     She wouldn't notice this at the time, but a growing shadow had begun to grow darker in the upper corner of the kitchen.  It had been there the whole time but she never thought to examine it closer.  The apartment was dark.  It was nighttime.  There was shadows everywhere.  She thought nothing of it at the time.

      As she scanned the walls and shelves for anything out of the ordinary, the phone began to ring.  It said Mom on the caller i.d.  It was late.  Why was her mom calling her.  She picked it up and hesitantly answered it.

"Hello?" she answered in an impatient tone.

"Hey.  I didn't wake you did I?"

"No, no, no.  I was awake," she said rubbing her eyes again.  "What's up?"

"What are you doing?  Watching your show?"

"I was but then I was getting ready for bed."

"Oh, okay."

"Hey mom..." she started.

"Yeah?"

"Have you..." she continued before stopping herself.  She didn't want to get into a conversation about the weird things that were happening.  Especially with her mom.  She would only make it worse.  It would only make everything scarier.  Plus, what could her mom tell her anyway.  They weren't that close.  Which is why it was weird she was calling so late.  It must be important, she thought.  "Is something wrong mom?"

"Wrong? No, nothing's wrong...it's just that," she said before trailing off and saying nothing.

     Jessica again wouldn't notice but the shadow that had been growing in the kitchen had now moved to where the desk was.  It had slid underneath looking like any other normal shadow would.

"What mom? What's wrong?" she asked growing more impatient.

"It's just that...is anything weird going on right now for you?"

She frowned her face.  Why was she asking that?  How could she possibly think that?  "What?" she replied.

"Like, is there like, how do you say...paranormal things happening in your apartment?"

"Why would you ask that mom?"

"I just get those feelings sometimes.  You know the feelings I used to get when you lived here.  Do you remember?"

"Yeah, I remember mom and I remember how scary you could get too when you would tell us the devil was in the walls."

"They were mija, they were.  I was only trying to protect my children."

"Protect? Ha.  And what is it now mom?  Are the devils in my walls?  Are you warning me about some kind of evil thing?" she said as all her childhood rage began to pour out.  She had left that home.  And she left for good reasons.  Her mom was always too superstitious to get any kind of motherly comfort from her.  Always felt like she just wanted to have control over her and her brothers and sister.  She didn't really care if they were okay.  She only cared if she was in control.  When bad things or just bad luck happened to her, she would blame other people for it and would wish them harm.  She even once saw her mom doing witchcraft in her bedroom.  At least that's what she thought it was.  

     She had heard whispering and weird sounding words one night being repeated over and over and over again.  So she got up from bed and headed towards her mother's bedroom.  Her door was slightly open and she saw her mom on her knees, with her hands together above her head with a thin silver chain wrapped around both her wrists, tying them together. She had dozens of candles lit in front of a mirror.  Her mom had her head facing the ground, rocking back and forth, whispering weird things.  She looked into the mirror from the small slice of space from the open door and to this day she swears she saw a shadowy figure in the reflection.

"I don't know mija, I just sort of all of a sudden had a bad feeling and needed to call you.  To see if everything was alright."

"Yeah mom, everything is alright," she said even though the weird things happening made it not alright.  The frustrations she felt toward her mom overtook any scared feeling she had.  Maybe that was good thing.  It got her mind off the strangeness that was going on.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes mom.  I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Okay mija."

And she hung up the phone.  She was frustrated but didn't understand why she was so annoyed by the phone call.  She almost couldn't control the negative emotions she was feeling.  She took a few moments to calm down and started to think about it.  That was a strange coincidence that she would call this late asking if anything weird was happening.  Because there was weird things happening.  Shit, the fact that her mom called and asked that was also a weird thing.  

     She took a breath and went to the dark, unlit bathroom and reached for the light switch but nothing was there.  She searched  for it in the darkness rubbing her hand on the wall but something felt wrong.  The wall felt like skin.  Like an old person's skin.  She pulled her hand away quickly.  What's happening, she thought.  She rubbed her eyes again and gently slapped her face.  Get a grip.  Get a grip.  She again reached for the light switch and it was exactly where it was every. single. time.  She turned the light on and went to the sink to wash her face.

     She didn't notice as she went to bend down to splash cold water on her face that her reflection did not bend down with her.  Instead it only moved its eyes following her as she bent down over the sink and stared.  

     When she stood up again, she grabbed the small towel hanging next to the sink.  She covered her entire face and took a few deep breaths.  Everything is okay.  Everything is okay, she repeated to herself.  The paranoia was beginning to take hold but she kept fighting to not lose this battle.  She pulled the towel off her face and looked at her reflection.  Was it smirking?  Was her reflection giving her the tiniest of smiles or was she, herself smiling and didn't notice?  I don't see that, she told herself closing her eyes.  But she did.  She wasn't going to validate it though by saying it was real.  It wasn't.  It couldn't be.  She shook her head and chose to ignore it.  She was about to leave the bathroom and turn off the light when she decided she would leave it on.  She looked around the living room with now, wide frightened eyes.  She didn't know what she was looking for.  She turned and headed to the bedroom before stopping.  She was absolutely sure, well as sure as she could be in her present state of mind that there was no knife sitting on the kitchen counter before.  Why would she pull one out?  She didn't.  Why was it sitting there though?  She stared at it as she slowly took a few steps towards it.  Her heart was beating so hard she could feel it in her neck.  It felt like it was about to burst through her ribcage.  Her eyes wide and throbbing.  How could this knife be here? Something wasn't right.  Yes.  Finally, she admitted it to herself.  This wasn't right.  Something otherworldly was going on.  Everything felt wrong.  There was something alien here.  

     Panic began to fill her lungs.  It felt like she was drowning.  Her eyes began to dart around the room as panic made her see crawling things on her arms.  Spider looking things.  She swiped them away but they didn't fly off.  No matter how hard she tried.  She screamed as she could feel little crawly things all over her body.  She shook her head wildly, swinging her arms and hair every which way.  And then nothing.  They were gone.  Like nothing had happened.  She took a moment to compose herself.  She took five or six deep breaths.  Hold it together, she thought.  She went to the bedroom and looked out the window just to make sure the world was still there and wasn't also doing weird things.  That's when she noticed a soft, silver gleam of light in the corner of her eye.  She turned her head and noticed that it was the silver amulet necklace sitting atop her dresser, the one she had bought at the antique shop.  It was glittering the light from outside.  She went to pick it up and stopped in horror.  In the mirror, she saw a shadowy figure standing behind her.  She turned around but there was nothing standing there but then much to her horror, there was a shadow lingering on the far wall. She stood frozen in fear.  She didn't know what she was looking at.  It was darker than any of the other shadows.  It swallowed any light it touched.  It was the deepest, darkest black she had ever seen.  She stood frozen in fear, getting sucked in by the darkness.  Falling into a trance like state.  And just then, her phone rang from the living room.  It took her out of her trance and she ran to the living room and answered.  It was her mom again.

"Mom! Mom!" she said crying.  "There is something wrong happening here.  It isn't right.  It's all wrong mom!"

But she got no answer.  "Mom?" she said softly.  "Are you there mom?"

"Jesssssica...is that you?" she said sounding like she was half asleep.

"Mom? What's wrong?"

"Jesssssica....." she said taking a long pause before asking, "Where am I?"

"Mom, what's wrong?"

"I don't...recognize this place," she said in a groggy sleepy voice.

"Mom, where are you? I'm coming to get you."

"I don't...know," she replied in a slow slur.  "I don't...feel right," she said.  "I'm thirsty."

"Mom, what's happening?"

"They're hurting me, Jessica."

"Who mom?  Who's hurting you?"

"I don't know...it's dark here...I don't know where I am..." then a loud shriek came out of the phone hurting her ear and then a staticky voice.  A foreign voice began to talk.  

"You want to see it! I'll show you!  Twenty four and six! You want to see it!  I'll show you! Twenty five and seven! Do you want to go to heaven.  Oh no, sorry, instead you will be dead.  And to hell you will go and you will burn.  Twenty six and six! It's the beast! You want to see it! I'll show you!"

She listened in horror.  There was a growing terror in her bones from not what it was saying but of the sound of this voice.  It had a metallic, static sound to it. It wasn't human.  It was emptiness.  It was something not of this world.  It was something that should not be here.  It wasn't the voice of a person.  It was the sound of the dread in the room.  The sound of the eeriness she felt drowning inside of her, it was the all the horror and terror she felt this night being poured into this voice.  It was the voice of a demon.  And it was coming from the amulet necklace.  She knew it.  She knew it in her soul.  She could feel a presence attached to it and it was pouring out of it.  Pouring out of the walls and floors.  Growing from the shadows.  It wanted to be here.  But it wasn't completely here, not yet.  She knew that.  But it was coming and it was hungry and she knew she was dinner.

     She had to get out of there.  She dropped the phone but could still hear that horrible voice screaming.  "You want to see it! I'll show you!  Even if you leave, you will never leave.  Try to hide and it will find you.  Twenty two and ten.  All your family is dead."

With every ounce of strength she began walking to the door.  It was like something was holding her in place.  Not letting her move.  She could only very slowly take one step at a time.  And right before her eyes, the apartment began to melt.  The walls began to sag and curve.  The ceiling sagged like a thick glob and the floor stuck to her feet.  The front door started to bend in unnatural ways.  She pulled all her strength to take another step towards the door before it melted away.  She took one heavy step after another.  All her pictures had transformed, they had demonic faces in them.  Some had animals eating children.  Mouths appeared in the walls, smiling with yellow sharp teeth.  Round shadow things with ten legs moved around the ground.  The pictures of herself now showed strange naked women with bleeding eyes and grinning cannibal teeth.  The apartment was collapsing on itself.  She needed to get out.

     What she didn't realize however, was that she wasn't actually walking toward the door.  She was really walking to the kitchen where the knife had been sitting on the counter.  She had grabbed it and had begun slicking her wrists.  Blood had begun pouring out of her as she collapsed to the floor.  Around her was just a normal apartment.  It wasn't melting.  There was no demonic voices screaming.  Nothing was moving.  It was just a girl bleeding out from her wrists.

***

She had awoken in the hospital connected to machines.  Her wrists hurt and she could barely breath.  She looked around the room and saw a nurse come in, "Where am I?" she asked.

"You're in the ICU.  You're fine.  Everything is okay.  Just stay calm. You're lucky to be alive."

     Many months later, it was explained to her that her neighbors had broken open her door because they could hear deathly screaming coming from inside.  Like a bloody murder was happening.  They had found her bleeding out on the kitchen floor.  They had saved her life.  She has since moved out of that apartment and gave back the amulet necklace to the antique shop.  

     She can still hear that hollow inhuman voice screaming from the phone.  She swears it was all real.  It still haunts her dreams and her waking moments.  And in all those weeks she spent recovering in the hospital, not once did her mom come visit.  She didn't know it at the time but she came to find out that was because her mom had died that same night.  She had also cut her own wrists and bled out.  Though, no one came through her door.  It would be days before anyone would find her.